Dealing with a lack of sexual desire: How toys can be the solution

Lack of sexual desire is a much more common phenomenon than you might think. You are not alone — many women experience a decrease in sexual desire at one point or another in life. The causes are varied: stress, fatigue, marital routine, hormones or emotional difficulties. But the good news is that there are ways to deal with it. One of the most innovative and enjoyable ways is to incorporate sex toys, which can enhance sensations, increase curiosity and rekindle desire and pleasure.

Why are you actually experiencing a lack of sexual desire?

Before talking about solutions, it's important to understand the source. Lack of sexual desire can stem from physical, mental, or marital factors:

Mental stress and ongoing pressure: work, children, daily obligations – all of these can suppress desire.
Hormonal changes: Periods such as childbirth, menopause, or taking birth control pills affect desire levels.
Ongoing couple routine: Even a stable relationship can become abrasive and harm spontaneity.
Low body image: Lack of self-confidence directly affects your ability to feel attractive and desirable.
Physical fatigue: Sometimes there is simply no strength. The body needs rest, but also the right stimulation to wake up again.

So what's the solution? Intimacy toys

Sex toys have long since ceased to be considered taboo, but rather a health tool that helps you understand your body, improve communication between couples, and renew sexual energy. Proper use can make your personal or romantic experience deeper and more exciting.

How can toys bring back desire?

Self-discovery: When you explore your body with toys, you learn what really turns you on. It’s not just pleasure – it’s a rediscovery of yourself.
Breaking a couple's routine: Introducing toys into a relationship adds excitement, playfulness, and curiosity.
Reducing stress and anxiety: Orgasm releases endorphins and dopamine, which elevate mood and enhance natural desire.
Solution to a physical difficulty: If you experience dryness or sensitivity, a gentle vibrator or stimulating gel can improve blood flow and facilitate sexual arousal.

Frequently Asked Questions About Lack of Sexual Desire and Toys

Does a lack of sexual desire mean that there is something wrong with me? Absolutely not. It is a temporary condition that can happen to anyone. Sometimes it is a natural reaction to burnout, fatigue or stress. Can toys replace intimate contact? No, they are not a replacement but a complement. They can upgrade the experience, help you feel passion again and enjoy intimacy as a couple. What toys are suitable for women with a lack of sexual desire?

External vibrator for gentle and light stimulation
Clitoral Stimulation Suction Toys
Vibrating eggs to strengthen pelvic floor muscles
Couple vibrator for shared use

How to incorporate toys into a relationship without feeling embarrassed?

Open communication is key. Start with a light conversation about fantasies and what you would like to try together with your partner. Choose a toy that you enjoy and make the experience part of the shared game. Sometimes the preparation itself: opening the box and the first experience – breaks the ice and creates a new excitement.

When should you seek professional help?

If the lack of desire persists over time and harms the quality of life or the relationship, it is recommended to contact a sexologist or couples counselor. Sometimes it is a deep emotional factor that requires understanding and professional guidance.

How to get started – simple steps to change

Dedicate time to yourself: Even 15 minutes alone with your body is important.
Try a gentle and safe toy that allows for self-exploration without pressure.
Create a relaxing atmosphere: soft lighting, pleasant music, and a scent you love.
Don't compare yourself to others: Desire varies from woman to woman and that's natural.
See it as a journey, not a destination: every small step is progress towards a deeper, healthier connection with yourself.

Do sex toys really improve desire over time?

Yes. Studies show that regular use of toys encourages the body to release hormones that increase natural desire. Furthermore, the feeling of control over one's own pleasure contributes to self-confidence, which restores the natural desire for intimacy.

Lack of sexual desire – a matter of communication, not just of the body

Sometimes what's holding you back isn't physical, but emotional. Open communication, self-acceptance, and a safe environment are the foundation for improvement. Toys can be practical communication tools: they allow you to express desires and learn to talk about sexuality without shame.

Toys as a secret weapon against routine

Renewing excitement in a relationship doesn't have to come from big places. Sometimes a small toy chosen together works wonders. It allows you to explore new sides of yourself and your relationship and create a sense of excitement and renewal that you haven't experienced in a long time.

Is there a connection between toys and sexual health?

Absolutely. Toys help increase blood flow, strengthen pelvic muscles, and improve body sensation. They also encourage stress relief, so they’re not just “play,” but a real tool for physical and mental health.

How to choose a toy that suits you?

When choosing a toy, think about:

Your experience level: If this is your first time, start with a gentle, easy-to-use toy.
Sensory preferences: external, internal, or combined stimulation.
Material and safety: Prefer high-quality, water-resistant medical silicone.
Quiet and Design: A discreet toy with a clean design can enhance the experience.

Questions to ask yourself before choosing

What makes me feel comfortable and confident?
Do I want to include my spouse?
What is my goal: pleasure, muscle strengthening, or emotional connection?

Advanced toys that enhance female sexuality

The toy industry has undergone a real revolution in the last decade. Today, you can find toys with motion sensors, remote control apps, customized vibration modes, and more. All of this is designed to help you experience pleasure in a conscious and controlled way, while listening to your body.

Tips for correct and safe use

Clean the toy before and after use.
Use an appropriate lubricant: preferably water-based.
Listen to your body: if something feels uncomfortable, stop immediately.
Store in a dry and sterile place.
Don't be shy about experimenting: even if it takes time to connect, it's part of the experience.

Are toys also suitable for women in long-term relationships?

Absolutely. Especially in a long-term relationship, where a sense of routine can sometimes develop, toys can be a breath of fresh air. They allow you and your partner to re-explore your bodies and communication, break down barriers, and create deeper intimacy.

So how do you start the journey back to desire?

It starts with a small step: deciding to choose yourself, your body, and your sexuality. Stop apologizing for your desires and start celebrating them. Toys are not luxuries – they are tools that allow you to reclaim control, pleasure, and self-love.

Selfish the perfect place to buy sex toys

If you too want to rediscover your passion, body and confidence, it's time to give yourself a different experience. At Selfish, we invite you to join our intimate revolution and discover a world where sexuality is natural, empowering and enjoyable. Here you will find a wide selection of the highest quality sex toys in the world: toys for women, men and couples, all with strict standards and innovative designs. Browse our website today and discover how a small toy can change the way you feel, experience and love.